Friday, February 22, 2013

How Young Men Use The Wonderful, Versatile Tee

By Paul Cann


Are you a man? Have you graduated High School but haven't gotten anyone pregnant yet? Do you take naps in the afternoon? If you answered "yes" to these questions, then you are most likely the owner of a massive collection of t-shirts. Don't be upset about this tiny fact, because tees happen to be the best article of clothing ever created. The t-shirt has to be one of the most versatile and simple torso coverings ever to be worn by man.

The t-shirt is miraculous because it fills so many roles that would otherwise require many different pieces to create the one-man-show that is the humble tee. One of these many roles t-shirts fulfill is the need for an expendable outer garb for when the sleeves have to be rolled up (or cut off) and work has to get done. The "working t-shirt" will bear the markings of past battles with such enemies as bleach, mustard, and holes.

Another type of t-shirt that can be observed is the "good" t-shirt. This is made example in the statement, "Oh, we're going to the bar? Let me put on my good t-shirt." This is usually the young male's favorite, typically with a fairly humorous pun or image across the chest. Please note that this shirt can (and will) be worn for multiple days if it remains relatively salsa-free and the wearer has a supply of fabric-freshener on hand.

The last t-shirt we'll talk about fills a very odd role in a man's life. This one is kept safe and put away merely for the sake of nostalgia. A significant other from the past may have considered this t-shirt her "favorite" of all the man's many shirts. She may have even used it to sleep in, leaving a lingering scent that the man may drunkenly sniff for late at night. The "favorite" t-shirt is usually never worn, but is often cried into.

One day this same man who wears t-shirts almost exclusively will grow into his full adult form. Not all t-shirts will be pushed aside, but many will give way to clothing more suitable for a professional environment. The permanent addition of a female and children will phase the man into the "casual polo" era. Once there, there is no turning back. The man is now an adult and the t-shirt becomes a thing of the past.




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